SPAM Haiku 15101-15200

Move backwards to Numbers 15001-15100.


15101.
Wife just got pregnant
Was it me or was it SPAM?
If SPAM, perhaps....AIDS?
--Trevor Eldredge, trevor@rhodesbread.com

15102.
Time at work goes by
Much faster when dreaming of
Pink cubed treat at home!

--Trevor Eldredge, trevor@rhodesbread.com

15103.
SPAM tried to mug me!
I shot it eight times with gun....
It is still alive!

--Trevor Eldredge, trevor@rhodesbread.com

15104.
Once stepped on pink cube.
I slipped and fell beside it...
You believe in fate?

--Trevor Eldredge, trevor@rhodesbread.com

15105.
Wife...out of perfume.
She still wants to turn me on.
SPAM's a sexy scent!

--Trevor Eldredge, trevor@rhodesbread.com

15106.
Pondering the can,
What are its mystic contents?
Stuff Posing As Meat

--Ender, ender@damagehq.net

15107.
How lovely the SPAM.
Miss Piggy wouldn't like it.
I bet Kermit would.

--Blandi Bug

15108.
SPAM-ku, so hard to
get the syllables correct
look i just did it

--darren andrew, middy@iinet.net.au

15109.
mystery substance
green eggs and SPAM, mmmm, tasty
picnic bonanza

--mtdport@yahoo.com

15110.
Sixty-five candles
on a single cube of SPAM
Happy Birthday, Dad!

--Bob Jonkman, bjonkman@sobac.com

15111.
Do not celebrate
with candles on a SPAM cube.
SPAM is flammable...

--Bob Jonkman, bjonkman@sobac.com

15112.
Have you noticed that
happy pigs make better SPAM?
Snouts grin up at me.

--Bob Jonkman, bjonkman@sobac.com

15113.
D.O.J. has ruled
Hormel has monopoly:
Must split snouts from tails.

--Bob Jonkman, bjonkman@sobac.com

15114.
The anosmiac
Cannot identify SPAM:
Yum! Tastes like chicken!

--Bob Jonkman, bjonkman@sobac.com

15115.
The SPAM curtains hang
Meatily open and squeal
Softly in the breeze

--finbar

15116.
Moslem friend's raving--
"This meat loaf's great! What's in it?"
Allah, I have sinned.

--Reed Monroe

15117.
Like die-hard smokers,
SPAM fans deny cancer link.
Chemotherapy.

--Reed Monroe

15118.
Hormel's policy
with regard to the contents:
It's "Don't ask, don't tell."

--Reed Monroe

15119.
Justice Department
sees monopoly in SPAM.
Breaks it up, with spoon.

--Reed Monroe

15120.
Charlton Heston in
Dramatic final scene cries,
"It's made out of SPAM!"

--Reed Monroe

15121.
The poor Hormel pigs
That their lives can be boiled down
Like so much SPAM-ku

--Bob Jonkman, based on a book review by, Lenore Skenazy

15122.
Why not for once use
If Elmers Glue won't do you
Use SPAM for your glue!

--Winter Wheeler, Sullenity@aol.com

15123.
SPAM and mayo rinse
for shiny hair--expensive
but I am worth it!

--southerndeb

15124.
Caught near my liver,
SPAM causes me a strange pain.
Like rubber heartache.

--ienne, BitrBitzer@aol.com

15125.
Quivering giblets,
Oh, what foods ye morsels be?
Unanswered question.

--Creln, WCKEMPE@aol.com

15126.
Moist, gooey membrane,
Glistens like shiny mucus,
Who would eat this stuff?

--Chris, via Creln, WCKEMPE@aol.com

15127.
The junk is like..........pink!
Oozing, goozing, slippery
Primordial soup.

--Chris, via Creln, WCKEMPE@aol.com

15128.
Vapors, stink released!!
Non-toxic, yet powerful!!
Culinary crap!!

--Blli, WCKEMPE@aol.com

15129.
Clanking tearing tin,
Heart of pink cold quivering:
Pangs of childhood sin

--poikilotherm

15130.
The word incarnate
Flesh, fat, skin, lung, maybe brain?
Our SPAM, our savior

--poikilotherm

15131.
The merry can of
SPAM once splot onto the plate
Now I leave chat room

--nickleewasmer, waz00@hotmail.com

15132.
whom SPAM what SPAM where
we SPAM SPAM when SPAM ain't here
now breath and repeat

--nickleewasmer, waz00@hotmail.com

15133.
a gourmet's delight:
candle and table at night
in the middle--SPAM

--ronin@e-station.com.ph

15134.
Well, how about this:
Left over slimy organs,
Like tripe, and anal.

--Ben

15135.
time to celebrate
peel open a can of SPAM
let the good times roll

--vern

15136.
I think about it
I help myself to a piece
I nibble it quick

--Deven, stickybaby@hotmail.com

15137.
in a flash it's gone
the plate still warm and steamy
my slice was too small

--deven, stcikybaby@hotmail.com

15138.
Ventura, SPAM, skeets;
all are in Minnesota,
the land of the freaks.

--Hunding, WCKEMPE@aol.com

15139.
SPAM on your body:
better contraceptive than
nonoxynal nine.

--Hunding, WCKEMPE@aol.com

15140.
SPAM or Valvoline:
each with viscosity of
S.A.E. thirty.

--Hunding, WCKEMPE@aol.com

15141.
Hey! What is that smell?
Look, that blue can is hissing!
Run, she's gonna blow!!

--Hunding, WCKEMPE@aol.com

15142.
SPAM is so yummy
I like it in my tummy
Do not take my SPAM

--Short_Jim

15143.
I DO EAT SPAM, YES
BUT I NEED TO KNOW GOOD DRINKS
TO WASH THE STUFF DOWN

--WOODIE ARGHLOP, IBSND@GO.NET

15144.
BEAT ME WITH SPAM CANS
THE GEL SOOTHES THE WOUNDS OH YES
SPAM I KNOW THE TRUTH

--T BUFF, TBUFF@BELLSOUTH.NET

15145.
EAT SPAM, EAT MORE, BELCH
THE TASTE OF GOOD SPAM IMPROVES
SPAM VOMIT'S THE SAME

--D COST, DCOST@BELLSOUTH.NET

15146.
DON'T WATCH AS I EAT
I ATTEND ALL THE MEETINGS
BUT I NEED THE FIX

--DR CUDDY, IBSND@GO.COM

15147.
A HEART HEALTHY TREAT
THE CAN TOP KEEPS ALL THE GEL
DON'T LET THAT STOP YOU

--CA BANKS, CABANKS77@YAHOO.COM

15148.
EATING SPAM BY NIGHT
ITS FLAVOR REMAINS INTACT
BUT THE BEAUTY FADES

--MR MACHO, MRMACHO62@AOL.COM

15149.
HEY SPARKY...EAT SPAM
TO HELL WITH YOUR GALLBLADDER
GREASE IS A DELIGHT

--CA BANKS, CABANKS77@YAHOO.COM

15150.
American foods
SPAM, Chick-o-Stick, and Cheez Whiz
Why are we obese?

--Kelvin Hyche, ibsnd@go.com

15151.
One SPAM-ku a day
Keeps the doctor right away!
Eating SPAM brings him!

--Trevor Eldredge, trevor@rhodesbread.com

15152.
Pink pencil holder
Jab the pencil through the gel
Writes and smells great too!

--Trevor Eldredge, trevor@rhodesbread.com

15153.
Sunburnt yesterday
I know the perfect ointment
SPAM mixed with ice cream

--Trevor Eldredge, trevor@rhodesbread.com

15154.
Ever wonder why
Doc Martins are so cushioned?
Soles are filled with SPAM!

--Trevor Eldredge, trevor@rhodesbread.com

15155.
In war there came SPAM
How can we get rid of it
In this time of peace?

--Angela Scott, angela.scott@ncn.ac.uk

15156.
What's this SPAM stuff then?
I've not touched it in my life
Am I missing out?

--Angela Scott, angela.scott@ncn.ac.uk

15157.
I see a pink thing
Regurgitating lunch now
This that I eat, SPAM!!

--Me, Myself and I, Me@Myself.I

15158.
never to report
clouds eat no SPAM over rain
when birds sing nothing

--egbert teeselink, koos@kaas.org

15159.
"Take this SPAM away!"
yelled the man on a diet.
"Bring me some SPAM Lite!"

--Paul, sutak@flash.net

15160.
"What is that?" asked Spock.
"It's SPAM, Mr. Spock. Try some."
"Most illogical."

--Paul, sutak@flash.net

15161.
SPAM is not so bad
If you disagree with me
Then I'll have your SPAM

--Dan Brower

15162.
Reeking of old age
You will hide deep in my fridge
For a time to kill

--Kirsh, Bigfatcow99@hotmail.com

15163.
You I will not eat
Your age is older than mine
Regale me with tales

--Kirsh, Bigfatcow99@hotmail.co

15164.
The shameful pleasure;
Enjoying a can of SPAM
It was all I had

--Big Edna

15165.
Titillating SPAM--
Cubed, in a gourmet omelet.
You don't have to know.

--Big Edna

15166.
The pinkness of SPAM
is not for the cowardly--
nor for weak stomachs.

--Big Edna

15167.
Picnic table SPAM.
Sated sparrow flies away
After leaving tip.

--J. D. Heskin, Blueforks@aol.com

15168.
meat infiltration
it's a job well done for the
SPAM Covert Ops Team

--Chuck Beard

15169.
deadly pink vapors
if you notice SPAM gas, it's
already too late

--Chuck Beard

15170.
archaeologists
will be mystified by SPAM
strange ancient icon

--Chuck Beard

15171.
Playing D & D
(trademark) fighting monsters with
my +4 SPAM can

--Chuck Beard

15172.
SPAM sushi you say?
Mmm, mmm. Cross-culture treat. Please
Pass the wasabi.

--Gordon B. Hinckley

15173.
I like SPAM. Me too!
That's three of us! No four! Four
Funerals today.

--Trevor Eldredge, trevor@rhodesbread.com

15174.
Use SPAM to clean up
Somebody's sick old throw up!
It tastes better too!

--Trevor Eldredge, Trevor@rhodesbread.com

15175.
Can Jews have pink treat?
They aren't supposed to eat pork.
What is SPAM? Who knows?

--Trevor Eldredge, Trevor@rhodesbread.com

15176.
What about Muslims?
What aren't they supposed to eat?
No one should eat SPAM!

--Trevor Eldredge, Trevor@rhodesbread.com

15177.
I imagine that
King Hormel has tried to sue
Webmaster John Cho!

--Trevor Eldredge, Trevor@rhodesbread.com

15178.
Two found dead in street.
Gun and can of SPAM nearby!
Murder weapon was.......?

--Trevor Eldredge, Trevor@rhodesbread.com

15179.
Shop lifter lifting
is overlooked by store clerk.
"You just take that SPAM."

--Allen in Little Rock

15180.
Miracle of SPAM
One can fed many people
Jesus and I wept

--Allen in Little Rock

15181.
Don't try to hide it
I see you 'neath the lettuce
Sneaky lil SPAM poo

--katie

15182.
Death in an instant!
Say no to peer pressure, yo.
Yo, you can do it!!

--katie-n-MD

15183.
Maybe if I'm poor
In health, cash, love, friends, and more
Till then, NO CANNED HAM!!

--katie-n-MD

15184.
A bad little boy
Your Mommy's gonna make you
Fried SPAM for dinner

--George Jacobs, fatcat_006@hotmail.com

15185.
Dead pigs are rising
From their graves of canned meat--Night
of the Living SPAM.

--George Jacobs, fatcat_006@hotmail.com

15186.
PLEASE, OR POR FAVOR
IX-NAY ON OSE-GRAY AM-SPAY
bonjour carne mal

--Anonymous

15187.
Fat little piggy
Hormeled into a square can.
His death is avenged.

--George Jacobs, fatcat_006@hotmail.com

15188.
Overly salted,
Oozing, gelatinous goo.
Hormel's genius.

--George Jacobs, fatcat_006@hotmail.com

15189.
Computers love spam.
Self-replicating spam lives.
With love, spam virus.

--Nick Rohring, rohring@purdue.edu

15190.
SPAM controls my life.
I can't live without my SPAM.
Junkie to the slime.

--Nick Rohring, rohring@purdue.edu

15191.
Tasteful Fake Meaty
Flavor Enters My Mouth Now
I Must Wash It Down

--Little Eddy Werther, PlaidSkanker@aol.com

15192.
YOU ARE SURROUNDED!!
Please drop the knife Mrs. Jones...
step back from the SPAM.

--Chris, stack59@yahoo.com

15193.
Pimpin' ain't easy
She brought back a can of SPAM
Ho', where's my money??

--Chris, stack59@yahoo.com

15194.
Is SPAM an oink-ment?
I rubbed it on my nipples,
it stopped the chafing.

--Chris, stack59@yahoo.com

15195.
pink cubes on sticks dipped
in mysterious sauces
SPAM fondue party

--Chuck Beard

15196.
The SPAM Avenger
deals harsh and swift pink justice
to meat offenders.

--Chuck Beard

15197.
The SPAM Avenger
has his own comic book now
guest starring SPAM Man

--Chuck Beard

15198.
SPAM is critical
to Hormel's evil plan of
world domination.

--Chuck Beard

15199.
Almighty SPAM God
I request your tasty meat
For it is divine

--Little Eddy Werther, PlaidSkanker@aol.com

15200.
I scream out loudly
The smell of SPAM filters in
Dinner is ready

--Zila, ZilaKid@AOL


Move forwards to Numbers 15201-15300.
Return to the SPAM Haiku Archive page.
John Nagamichi Cho


SPAM is a registered trademark of Hormel Foods Corporation for luncheon meat. The Haiku Archive Master and the contributors to this website have no legal, commercial or financial involvement with Hormel Foods. Neither the information presented here, nor the manner in which it has been presented, has been sanctioned by Hormel Foods.