SPAM Haiku 9201-9300

Move backwards to Numbers 9101-9200.


9201.
Pigs eat anything
except SPAM. Non-cannibals
and intelligent.
--k.i.

9202.
In a desolate
cabin, found ten year old SPAM.
Still good and still bad.

--k.i.

9203.
Shipwrecked on island,
case of SPAM drifts to the shore.
Make raft, look for food.

--k.i.

9204.
Palouse addiction:
I crouch, hidden by wheatfields,
and slurp down sweet SPAM.

--Kurt Bouman

9205.
Dining in Paris
SPAM on the Champs-Elysees:
Vraiment deguellasse!

--Kurt Bouman

9206.
SPAM comes in a tin
SPAM is covered in jelly
SPAM tastes like dog shit

--Anonymous

9207.
Try SPAM to write 'ku?
Rather write my own obit.
Some choice. Same result.

--Anonymous

9208.
Why SPAM ku? Jerky,
Pork rind, crack dealers relieved,
Though vaguely jealous.

--Anonymous

9209.
SPAM ku confuses
Hormel? No surprise. Union
Busting, poems don't mix.

--Anonymous

9210.
SPAM ku pathetic.
Scared to speak at meetings too?
Post Dilbert on cube.

--Anonymous

9211.
Imagination
Wasted on SPAM ku. Why not
Fight real injustice?

--Anonymous

9212.
So thick and juicy,
Perfect with lettuce and cheese,
SPAM rocks the lunch world!

--Nichole

9213.
Reluctant I am
the plate of SPAM in my face.
The rave makes no sense

--hyroglifik, hyroglifik@hotmail.com

9214.
do not hate the spam
her beauty is in life's lunch
o brave silent meat

--omi

9215.
grasses of summer--
of brave warriors' SPAM, they
are all that remains

--A.Commons, aec24@columbia.edu

9216.
even this grass hut,
in an ever-changing world
may hold hoarded SPAM

--A. Commons, aec24@columbia.edu

9217.
fleas and lice do bite,
horse pisses by my pillow--
why do I think SPAM?

--A. Commons, aec24@columbia.edu

9218.
how silent it is--
sinking deep into the SPAM,
the cicada's cry

--A. Commons, aec24@columbia.edu

9219.
SPAM torn from its can,
I leave you for Futami;
autumn too departs

--A. Commons, aec24@columbia.edu

9220.
SPAM. Pink and oval.
You buy it at the Mobil.
Made in Chernobyl.

--Save ferris

9221.
SPAM, mystery slime;
Treet, grandiose luncheon gak.
Oh, how I love thee.

--Sgt. Spanky, jpsprfreak@aol.com

9222.
I open a can
Of the wonderful product
SPAM and cook it up

--Kelly, none of your business

9223.
spam, a deeper love
why can't i live without spam
i need spam right now

--Redentor Casanova

9224.
sit in noxious fumes
haunted by ghost of SPAMs past
consume SPAM no more

--Redentor Casanova

9225.
The prerequisite:
Floppy, conjealed jellyfish.
Oleo never.

--Spamspeare, ben_weaver@capehs.cape.K12.me.us

9226.
Molded to can's shape
Heroic chunk battles teeth
Ends a salty mush

--RNC, ursula@pacbell.net

9227.
Apocalypse comes.
Civilization destroyed.
Only SPAM is spared.

--racada, suncat@northlink.com

9228.
Future diggers find
petrified processed pork parts.
A pink time capsule.

--racada, suncat@northlink.com

9229.
Gelatinous goo
Your subliminal power
Urges me to bowl

--adam juntunen, ajuntunen@fsi-intl.com

9230.
New SPAMARONI
The San Fernando treat, yum!
Try SPAMARONI

--ChumbaSPAMwamba, dgjhgfvjhgfvjdh

9231.
Poor M.C Hammer
He is now M.C Spammer
I pity him much

--SPAM T.V.

9232.
i am very sad
my friend typed in spam jabber
she is a weenie

--SPAM T.V.

9233.
SPAM came from heaven
It descended into hell
It will come again...

--SPAM T.V.

9234.
Oh SPAM is the light
Oh holy SPAM forgive me
I ate too much TREET!

--SPAM T.V.

9235.
I love thee sweet SPAM
I don't care if he is meat
He is my pink love!!!

--SPAMbadextrose

9236.
Oh mighty king SPAM
We cower in your pinkness
Save us from your wrath

--SPAMbadextrose

9237.
SPAM is everywhere
Love SPAM, nurture SPAM, keep SPAM
And you must eat SPAM

--The teacher of the word of SPAM

9238.
Thou must love thy SPAM
Eat thy healthy hunk of SPAM
Love one another

--The teacher of the word of SPAM

9239.
Love thy holy SPAM
Treat it as you treat yourself
Love thy loving SPAM

--The teacher of the word of SPAM

9240.
Damn! The ring broke off!
Now it'll never open
'til I get my gun.

--Anonymous

9241.
Screw proper food groups!
Mom was never right about
my life anyway!

--Anonymous

9242.
When SPAM's set afire
It pops and crackles loudly
Toxic cloud rises

--Anonymous

9243.
INTERNET BURNOUT
IT DARES ME CRAVE THE PINK CAVE
OF CHILDHOOD LOVE......SPAM

--PRESSEDHAM DONTKNAP, docyoga@aol.com

9244.
pretty meat treats swirl
in the blender`s sweet, sweet world
porcine paste unfurled

--PRESSEDHAM DONTKNAP, docyoga@aol.com

9245.
more SPAM would I use
`twere not for fear, I would meet
DEATH on craggy CAN

--PRESSEDHAM DONTKNAP, docyoga@aol.com

9246.
SPAM and E-Coli
hath such twinkle upon eye
why fear my life I?

--PRESSEDHAM DONTKNAP, docyoga@aol.com

9247.
Some one told me true
I swear...SPAM is made from the
Old tampons of CHER

--PRESSEDHAM DONTKNAP, docyoga@aol.com

9248.
NO WONDER!!!!! says I
SONNY would ski into tree
Before eating SPAM

--PRESSEDHAM DONTKNAP, docyoga@aol.com

9249.
Tammy Wynette, Lord
Facin' The Great Pork Heaven
Standin' By Her SPAM

--PRESSEDHAM DONTKNAP, docyoga@aol.com

9250.
Fab or Rob I ask
Which Silli Millie like SPAM
Lies lifeless tonight?

--PRESSEDHAM DONTKNAP, docyoga@aol.com

9251.
Who could LOVE me now
that years of eating SPAM have
turned me into COW.

--PRESSEDHAM DONTKNAP, docyoga@aol.com

9252.
I strive to be man
Not eat crap from funky can
I eat what I am

--PRESSEDHAM DONTKNAP, docyoga@aol.com

9253.
Dow Crash Imminent(?)
Instinct to survive .......stocks: DEATH
SPAM and GUNS survive

--PRESSEDHAM DONTKNAP, docyoga@aol.com

9254.
On yon Internet
Be there fair maiden frothy
For SPAM porno date?

--PRESSEDHAM DONTKNAP, docyoga@aol.com

9255.
Monica......Oh ....GOD.....
Your gaping SPAMMY rictus
Good for quick fixes.......

--PRESSEDHAM DONTKNAP, docyoga@aol.com

9256.
Whoops! I forgot to
stick to SPAM haiku... What an
ASS I've turned into.

--PRESSEDHAM DONTKNAP, docyoga@aol.com

9257.
No one cares Prest Ham......
What you think you am GODDAMN
EAT SPAM LIKE A MAN!!!!

--PRESSEDHAM DONTKNAP, docyoga@aol.com

9258.
VEGETARIAN
You Pussy boy Mr. MOM
SPAM will make you MAN

--PRESSEDHAM DONTKNAP, docyoga@aol.com

9259.
SPAM can not heal a
broken vessel but it feels
good when rubbed on one!

--PRESSEDHAM DONTKNAP, docyoga@aol.com

9260.
Whew! My social grace
is in jeopardy when I
write Spameous prose.

--PRESSEDHAM DONTKNAP, docyoga@aol.com

9261.
`Tis time to stop this
folly when say I "Golly
look at the SPAM time!!!!!!"

--PRESSEDHAM DONTKNAP, docyoga@aol.com

9262.
Hillary I think
of your lonely nights and then.......
I take SPAM in hand..........

--PRESSEDHAM DONTKNAP, docyoga@aol.com

9263.
If only Bill were
more of a man he would more
LOVE your SPAM-like gland.

--PRESSEDHAM DONTKNAP, docyoga@aol.com

9264.
when Bill woke up .....it
was a "Chelsea morning" ......the
first thing on his SPAM......

--PRESSEDHAM DONTKNAP, docyoga@aol.com

9265.
So pink, so salty
You taunt me from your blue can
A pull tab away

--John Tuttle, Jdtutgb@aol.com

9266.
Place Salsa on SPAM
Yo Quiero Taco Bell
Spamito Supreme

--adalton

9267.
While we ingest SPAM
Our internal organs are
Waving the white flag

--mike fink, MikeTMBG@tmbg.org

9268.
SPAM must be good, for
"Weird Al" wrote a song 'bout it
And praised its nature

--mike fink, MikeTMBG@tmbg.org

9269.
Lovely and pink, you
glisten in the morning sun.
SPAM, I adore thee.

--wombatbob

9270.
Once there was a boy
He liked to eat lots of SPAM
May he rest in peace

--Mike Fink, MikeTMBG@tmbg.org

9271.
Hi my name is Tad.
When I don't have SPAM I'm sad.
When I do I'm glad.

--Tad Dunbar

9272.
Why Tad likes canned SPAM
Compare thee to a fine wine
I collect them both

--Tad

9273.
I can't eat the stuff.
I'm a vegetarian.
Phil wrote this haiku!

--Phil Scroggs, phil.scroggs@mindspring.com

9274.
a lifetime of SPAM
there's no need to be embalmed
mummification

--MIKEYLIKESIT, drjin@aol.com

9275.
Wipe away my tears
I opened a new SPAM can
And found it empty

--Wild T.

9276.
I open the SPAM
I ask the SPAM about Love
The SPAM just sits there

--Wild T.

9277.
I open the SPAM
I ask the SPAM about War
The SPAM just sits there

--Wild T.

9278.
I open the SPAM
I ask the SPAM about Life
The SPAM just sits there

--Wild T.

9279.
The SPAM opened up
It asked me about Mustard
I then shit myself

--Wild T.

9280.
Candles and Roses
Condoms and a SPAM woman
That boy needs some help

--Wild T.

9281.
Trapped in SPAMku hell
Uncle Jay, Geoff Holme, SOMEONE!!!
Please try to save me!

--Wild T.

9282.
Honey, help me out
Is there some reason we have
SPAM in the tape deck?

--Wild T.

9283.
New fat removal
Liposuction by Hormel
SPAM productions rise

--Wild T.

9284.
New Fraternity
Brothers in the blue house of
SPAM Beta Kappa

--Wild T.

9285.
Edge of starvation
Should I take SPAM or take death
Like I really care

--Wild T.

9286.
"Hey, show us your SPAM!"
A Mardi Gras catch phrase that
Never quite caught on

--Wild T.

9287.
SPAM turned out to be
Just the remedy for my
Ugly athlete's foot

--Wild T.

9288.
Got all liquored up
Ended up with a tattoo
Of SPAM on my ass

--Wild T.

9289.
What makes them do this?
Pink loaves up and down the shore
The SPAM beach themselves

--Wild T.

9290.
The slick jelly lube
My tongue flicks your hot pinkness
Let my SPAM fill you

--Wild T.

9291.
Something wasn't right
With the SPAM I had last night
It burns when I pee

--Wild T.

9292.
Though smooth at first glance,
Like the frailty of our lives,
So SPAM is porous.

--B.W.F.

9293.
If one can not say
Anything good about SPAM,
Say bad things instead!

--DorkFace, MikeTMBG@tmbg.org

9294.
The dumbest sentence
Would undoubtedly include
SPAM and hairy gas

--DorkFace, MikeTMBG@tmbg.org

9295.
Where could Ruben be?
The keyboard player is there,
Signing chunks of SPAM.

--DorkFace, MikeTMBG@tmbg.org

9296.
When all's said and done
The battle will have been won
By knights with SPAM swords

--DorkFace, MikeTMBG@tmbg.org

9297.
Many are hungry
Yet, the needs of the many
Still don't warrant SPAM

--DorkFace, MikeTMBG@tmbg.org

9298.
Son, fear the pink meat.
Where it goes, evil's not far.
Tell this to your kids.

--Andrew Sbanotto, antifred@yahoo.com

9299.
I can't believe it!
The new SPAM can, a blue void!
Like my broken heart!

--james, simply james

9300.
"Wow, am I starving"
SPAM is hastily prepared
"I'm not hungry now"

--Alex L., farfromuzin@mindless.com


Move forwards to Numbers 9301-9400.
Return to the SPAM Haiku Archive page.
John Nagamichi Cho


SPAM is a registered trademark of Hormel Foods Corporation for luncheon meat. The Haiku Archive Master and the contributors to this website have no legal, commercial or financial involvement with Hormel Foods. Neither the information presented here, nor the manner in which it has been presented, has been sanctioned by Hormel Foods.