The Perfect Italian Sub

What makes one Italian sub different from another? More importantly, what are the defining characteristics of the elusive perfect Italian sub?

In one man's opinion, here's what does it:

• The Sandwichmaker
  I know, it seems like it shouldn't make a difference, but it does. In order to achieve the perfect sub, the sandwich maker needs to be someone who not only enjoys, but also takes pride in his work.

• The Bread
  The bread is tricky. You need a bread that can hold its own against (and, more importantly, as part of) the sandwich. The bread needs to be strong enough that it won't fall apart holding the over-stuffed contents. The bread needs to have good flavor of its own, but not too much -- the bread should add to, but not distract from the sandwich.

• The Condiments
  One side of the bread should have mustard spread on it. The choice of mustard is tricky. Plain yellow mustard just won't do. You need something more, maybe a dijon or a spicy brown mustard -- but not too much more. You want to be able to taste the mustard, but you don't want its flavor overpowering anything else.

  The other side of the bread should have mayonaise spread on it.

  When all the ingredients are in the sandwich, the oil should be poured on. The oil should be used only lightly -- the end result should be that the bread is moistened, not that the sandwich is dripping.

  Lastly, the sandwich should be lightly salted.

• The Freshness of the Ingredients
  This shouldn't need to be said, but, sadly, it apparently does. Everything used in the sandwich must be absolutely fresh. The bread baked no more than 48 hours ago. The lettuce crisp and crunchy. The tomatoes succulent and juicy. The pickles tart, crisp, and juicy. The meat fresh, tender, and tasty.

• The Meat
  I've said it already, but let me say it again: the meat should be fresh. Your typical Italian sub will have three meats, bologna, mortadella, and salami. The three meats need to compliment each other. The salami is the most important, and should be a fine Genoa samlami, good and tasty.

  If there's only one layer of each kind of cold cut, you paid too much for the sandwich.

• Shredded Lettuce
  Big pieces of lettuce, bad; shredded lettuce, good. Shredded lettuce allows the oil, the juice from the tomatoes, and the pickle juice to permeate the sandwich freely, providing a more even, consistent taste.

• Lots of Pickles
  Little bits of chopped up dill pickle. Lots of them. So many that no matter how you pick up the sandwich to take a bite at least one or two pickle pieces fall off and there's still enough pickles per bite. Really. Unless your first reaction to seeing the sandwich is "Maybe there is such a thing as too many pickles...", there's not enough.

• No Peppers
  Peppers are simply a vegetable with far too much attitude to be in an Italian sub, either in their hot or green variety. (Actually, peppers generally shouldn't be used in anything...)