From -------@MIT.EDU Tue Mar  2 02:10:07 2004
Date: Mon, 3 Mar 2003 05:57:47 -0500
From: Alexander Schmidt <-------@MIT.EDU>
To: nihilists Subject: toothpaste

Colgate Total is the best toothpaste in the entire world.  Do you fuckers hear
me?  The best.  It's almost six in the morning, and Colgate Total is the best
thing in all life.  You don't understand.  The best.  How could you understand?
Experience it.  This toothpaste is sex.  It's Jesus Christ our Lord and Savior
coming in your mouth, on your face, all over your body, direct into your brain.
FUCK.  So clean.  So delicious.  Mark my words, it'll all be over one day, and
Colgate will be on the top, the goddamned T to the O to the TAL, rancid and
screaming, standing on the corpses of its enemies and just wailing on and on
about god only knows what.  Lunatic toothpaste.  Nothing better.  See, what I'm
getting at -- the exPERIENCE.  Of full and raging whole-body orgasms of clean.
Science and religion can't compare.  Nothing better.  Nothing better.