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Date: Sat, 10 Feb 2001 22:36:00 -0500
To: suspects@MIT.EDU
From: jhimawan@alum.mit.edu (Joice Himawan)
Subject: 10 top ways to tell if Martha Stewart is stalking your dog 
X-Evolution: 00000088-0000

I pass this one on 'cause I got a kick out of it.  -J

>10. There's potpourri hanging from his/her collar.
>
>9. The dog's nails have been cut with pinking shears.
>
>8. The dog toys are all stored in McCoy crocks.
>
>7. The pooper scooper has been decorated with raffia.
>
>6. That telltale lemon slice in the new silver water bowl.
>
>5. You find liver and whole wheat dog treats stamped out with copper
>cookie cutters and decorated with royal icing using a #2 rosette tip.
>
>4. Dog hair has been collected and put into wire baskets for nesting
>material for the birds.
>
>3. A seasonally appropriate grapevine wreath adorns the front of your
>dog's crate.
>
>2. Your dog goes outside naked and comes in wearing a thyme colored
>virgin wool hand knitted sweater with matching boots.
>
>AND THE NUMBER ONE WAY YOU KNOW THAT MARTHA STEWART IS STALKING YOUR DOG IS
>
>1. The dog droppings in your backyard have been sculpted into swans.