From kaufman@gmuvax2.gmu.edu Mon Mar 26 16:41:54 1990
Date: Mon, 26 Mar 90 08:07:38 -0500
From: kaufman@gmuvax2.gmu.edu (Ken Kaufman)
To: There-Aint-No-Such-Thing-As-A-Free-Lunch@ucbvax.Berkeley.EDU
Subject: for those of you who remember SoupCon...

	Pooh asks that this little reminder show up here ...


when i was a hacker i carried me pack
and i led the free life of a random.
from the west coast to DC to boston and back
we went to the cons and met fandom.
then a day late in august dear lizzy said come
it's time to start cooking there's work to be done.
So she gave me a paint brush, and money for rum,
and sent me away to the store.

And the hackers came waltzing to soupcon,
down the turnpike and down the beltway.
but the parents all called, and no one had balls,
so we turned all the minors away.

oh, how i remember that wonderful day,
when we all embarked on the journey.
to meet in the middle of piscataway,
in deepest and darkest new jersey.
mamaliz was all ready, she'd primed herself well.
she put me in shackles and then gave me hell.
she whipped me and beat me and flogged me as well,
and i remembered why i love new jersey.

and the hackers came waltzing to soupcon,
down the turnpike and down the parkway.
in cars and in planes, the green tortoise and trains,
there was no way to keep them away.

i remember the moment we finally arrived,
and we were surprised by the quiet.
with thousands of randoms from ten different states,
we thought sure there would be a riot.
then a hug from /amq knocked me ass over head,
she tried to be subtle but was blatant instead.
and when i woke up i was tied to the bed,
and all around me the sheets were on fire.

and the randoms came waltzing to soupcon,
all responding without a delay.
they put out the bed, found mrose instead,
and the lights all faded away.

they collected the burned-out, the drugged-out, the spent,
the people with hair on their palms.
we put them out back and erected a tent,
for the proud wounded heroes of soupcon.
and as the caddy pulled into the driveway once more,
SU clearly had no monopoly on "SCORE",
and adam mackler asked, "what are they writhing for?",
but the sirens just drowned out the question.

and the cops came waltzing to soupcon,
and we all got carried away.
murphy's law never fails--they took us to jail,
and they took all our sex toys away.

by the next morning glenny'd bailed us out,
and they gave us back most of our sex toys.
except for the crop which they kept for themselves,
to discipline wayward young playboys.
And pooh was a-walking all bent, stiff and sore,
and searching in vain for the gold seal she wore.
and larry was grinning much wider than before,
but who bagged him first was the question.

And a-home we went waltzing from soupcon,
a-dragging our feet all the way.
but in one resound, we all turned around,
who needs our old jobs anyway?

Waltzing to soupcon, waltzing to soupcon,
who'll go a-waltzing to soupcon with me?
and the call may be heard, as you're passing by st. george's church
(Spoken: who the FUCK is gonna clean up that MESS!?!?!?)
who'll go a-waltzing to soupcon with me.

               -nic and larry..., 8/85