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\title {\begin{center}
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Inessential Courtesy \\
{\Huge For Morons} \\ {\small (\manvers)}
%\\ {\Huge\bf BLEED ON ME}
}

\author {Dave Cho (dcctdw@athena.mit.edu) ; Chad Brown (yandros@athena.mit.edu)}

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\begin{document}
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\section{Introduction: SIDDOWN AND SHADDAP}

{\bf This means you.}

Every once in awhile, you'll hear people talking about {\bf FTGOS}.  {\bf
FTGOS} stands for {\em Furthering The Goals Of SIPB}.  Very loosely
speaking, the {\em Goals Of SIPB} are to help users.

\section{NOW PAY ATTENTION}

Most people who are new to computers are, by definition, not familiar with
computers.  This means that they aren't logged in over 5 hours every day;
this means that they don't know what's going on.  They generally don't use
{\em emacs, \LaTeX, gnus}.  They don't know how to run their life from
within {\em emacs}.  Maybe they know enough to use {\em xmh}.  {\bf This is
not a cardinal sin.} The point is to {\em help} them.

Let me repeat that again.  We are here to {\em help users}.  There is much
more to helping people than just telling them {\em ``read the stock
answer''}.

\section{Things to keep in mind.}

If someone comes in asking a question, they're not looking to be belitted.
{\bf To belittle} means {\em to disparage, to decry, to degrade, to
depreciate, to insult}.  If they ask a question about EZ, it is {\bf not}
acceptable to make a snide comment about ``how EZ sucks''.  It is not
acceptable to mutter about ``how clueless people are who use EZ.''

Equally important is that the users are interested in getting a prompt,
correct answer.  They are not interested in hearing lots of jargon which
they don't understand.  They are not here to be impressed by what knowledge
you have, be it little or large, real or apparent.

\section{So, what's the point?}

The point is that I have seen {\em several} instances in the past few weeks
where {\em both} members {\bf and} prospectives have been flippant, rude,
insulting, what have you, to people who come in with questions.  The
actions have ranged from snide comments to grandstanding.

\section{Sit back down.}

If you think your behavior may have conformed to the above description,
then change it.  If you see someone else acting out of line, tell them --
{\bf in private}.  There's an old axiom: {\em Praise in public; criticize
in private.}  We don't need to have pointing fingers contests in the
office; we don't need to have checklists of people who have been good and
bad.  This isn't {\em Santa Claus meets Big Brother}.  But this {\bf is}
serious. 

\section{And do shut up.}

You may think you know a lot about computers.  You're probably wrong.  But
even if other people think you know a lot, this is not an acceptable reason
to lord it over people.  This is not a good reason to become self-impressed
with what little status you may you have accorded yourself by being in the
same room as someone else.  When AFS falls off the net, it is not necessary
to have a major hernia and start flying off walls.  The AFS servers will
not be impressed by how many people you bowl over as you storm the machine
room.  Anyone with a scrap of intelligence will not think you are cool just
because you've had a truly uninteresting conversation with Jim Bruce or
Jeff Schiller.  (Would we think you are cool just because you've had a
conversation with Bill Clinton?  Michael Jackson?  Diana Ross?  No.
Q.E.D.)

I realize this comes as a shock, but the point of this document is to get
people to be more aware of {\bf manners} and people's {\bf feelings}.
Helping computer users does {\em not} involve petty political games.  It
does {\em not} involve gossiping about petty secrets.  It {\em does}
require mutual respect amongst members and between users alike.

\section{One last note...}

Note that politely, and slowly, explaining to a user that ``really, using
EZ to write a technical paper with lots of equations is bad'' is useful,
{\bf if} you explain {\em why}.  ``EZ doesn't have good capabilities for
writing equations, while \LaTeX does.  Here: this is Inessential \LaTeX;
read it, and afterwards, if you have questions, feel free to come back here
and ask them.''

{\bf Don't} tell them that they're stupid, {\bf don't} act as if you know
everything, {\bf don't} piss them off, and {\bf make sure} that they feel
comfortable coming back in here and asking more questions.

We have a reputation for being a bunch of elitist snobs (some use more
colorful language).  This is not a good thing.  An incorrect response is
``oh well''.  The correct response is ``I'm going to fix it.''

\section{Where to Get More Information}

Try asking your {\em mother}.  See other documents.

\section{Acknowledgments}

The authors would like to thank those whose insensitivity made it necessary
for some of us to work harder.

\end{document}