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YOU MIGHT BE AN ENGINEER IF ...

>>YOU MIGHT BE AN ENGINEER IF ...
>>
>>you have no life, and you can PROVE it mathematically.
>>you enjoy pain.
>>you know vector calculus but you can't remember how to do long division.
>>you chuckle whenever anyone says "centrifugal force."
>>you've actually used every single function on your graphing calculator.
>>when you look in a mirror, you see an engineer.
>>it's sunny and 70 degrees outside, and you're working on a computer 
>(Bingo!)
>>you have things related to StarTrek in your work area.
>>you always stays late at work on Friday nights.
>>you know how to integrate a chicken and can take the derivative of water.
>>you think in "math."
>>you've calculated that the World Series actually diverges.
>>you hesitate to look at something because you don't want to break down its
>>wave function.
>>you have a pet named after a scientist.
>>you laugh at jokes about mathematicians.
>>the Humane Society has you arrested because you actually performed the
>>Schrodinger's Cat experiment.
>>you can translate English into binary.
>>you can't remember what's behind the door in the science building which 
>says
>>"Exit."
>>you have to bring a jacket with you, in the middle of summer, because
>>there's a wind-chill factor in the lab.
>>you are completely addicted to caffeine 
>>you avoid doing anything because you don't want to contribute to the
>>eventual heat-death of the universe.
>>you consider ANY non-science course "easy."
>>when your professor asks you where is your homework is, you claim to have
>>accidentally determined it's momentum so precisely, that according to
>>Heisenberg it could be anywhere in the universe.
>>the "fun" center of your brain has deteriorated from lack to use.
>>you'll assume that a "horse" is a "sphere" in order to make the math 
>easier.
>>you understood more than five of these indicators.
>>you make a hard copy of this list, and post it on your door.
>>
>>If these indicators apply to you, there is a good reason to suspect that 
>you
>>might be classified as an engineering major.  I hope this clears up any
>>confusion.
>
************************* Azeem Iqbal Pirani *************************
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***********************   pirani@xiber.com    ************************
************ http://www.egr.uh.edu/~ahs21457/venture.html ************

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