>WHAT DRIVING TO THE STORE WOULD BE LIKE IF OPERATING SYSTEMS RAN YOUR CAR
>
>  >> MS-DOS:  You get in the car and try to remember where you put your keys.
>  
>  >> Windows:  You get in the car and drive to the store very slowly, because
>     attached to the back of the car is a freight train.
>  
>  >> Macintosh System 7:  You get in the car to go to the store, and the car
>     drives you to church.
>  
>  >> UNIX:  You get in the car and type GREP STORE.  After reaching speeds of
>     200 miles per hour en route, you arrive at the barber shop.
>  
>  >> Windows NT:  You get in the car and write a letter that says, "go to the
>     store."  Then you get out of the car and mail the letter to your
>     dashboard.
>  
>  >> Taligent/Pink:  You walk to the store with Ricardo Montalban, who tells
>     you how wonderful it will be when he can fly you to the store in his
>     Learjet.
>  
>  >> OS/2:  After fueling up with 6000 gallons of gas, you get in the car and
>     drive to the store with a motorcycle escort and a marching band in
>     procession.  Halfway there, the car blows up, killing everybody in town.
>  
>  >> S/36 SSP [mainframe, obv.]:  You get in the car and drive to the store. 
>     Halfway there you run out of gas.  While walking the rest of the way,
>     you are run over by kids on mopeds.
>  
>  >> OS/400:  An attendant locks you into the car and then drives you to the
>     store, where you get to watch everybody else buy filet mignons.
>