SPAM Haiku 19601-19695

Move backwards to Numbers 19501-19600.

19601.
Empathize with them
Cut your finger on SPAM top
Pigs must feel that too

--cornbread2, hgilkerson@yahoo.com

19602.
Stomach full of SPAM
Swimming is prohibited
Rocks sink in water

--Cornbread2, hgilkerson@yahoo.com

19603.
I envision a
world where all mankind shares SPAM
and none go without.

--Fozzie

19604.
Frugal SPAM repast
to quiet growling stomach.
Damn this poverty!

--Milford Pigboy

19605.
Dwindling SPAM stockpile;
leftovers from better times.
Wolf is at the door.

--Milford Pigboy

19606.
Cardboard box living;
SPAM-grease fire to warm my hands;
can edge for razor.

--Milford Pigboy

19607.
When good times return,
with God as my witness, I'll
not eat SPAM again!!

--Milford Pigboy

19608.
Hear attacks for sale!
Available at grocers!
Better known as SPAM!

--cornbread2, hgilkerson@yahoo.com

19609.
Cook it in the can
SPAM, block of cheese, brown sugar
I can't get it out

--Phil and Amy Timberlake

19610.
SPAM--A mystery
I know! Pig skins and rat tails
in K-Y Jelly.

--Leslie Young, les955@hotmail.com

19611.
Meaty pink like SPAM
Lubricated like it too
You are my SPAM man

--Leandra Placentia, Le626@hotmail.com

19612.
Bodies disappear
The morgues are all empty now
SPAM stock sky-rockets

--Leandra Placentia, Le626@hotmail.com

19613.
Pink porcine passion
Unzip the can, give it here
Wham! Bam! Thank you SPAM!

--Froggy, firebynight@excite.com

19614.
Feds seize my blue can
Suspected terrorism
SPAM's not Al Qaeda

--Kathie Reyer

19615.
Mouthful of pink flesh
Monica Lewinsky knows
She can't swallow SPAM

--Kathie Reyer

19616.
Stress got you down? Grab
The blue tin, and enjoy the
Smooth, pure taste of SPAM!

--Brenna, ThugLadybug@AOL.com

19617.
"Well, who's the father?
Is it Carlos?" "No, Michael,
The father is...SPAM!!!!!"

--Brenna, ThugLadybug@AOL.com

19618.
I've wandered the earth
For that elusive scoundrel...
SPAM wins yet again!

--Brenna, ThugLadybug@AOL.com

19619.
You watch, mesmerized...
It glistens seductively
Philanderous SPAM!

--Brenna, ThugLadybug@AOL.com

19620.
You know, I could be
Doing my job right now; but
Instead...I verse SPAM!

--Brenna, ThugLadybug@AOL.com

19621.
I mean, I AM done
With all my tasks. So what's left
Is SPAM poetry.

--Brenna, ThugLadybug@AOL.com

19622.
Chilling ransom note!!
It reads as follows: "Send SPAM,
Or the victim dies!"

--Brenna, ThugLadybug@AOL.com

19623.
The roaches scurry
To and fro the rich food mound
(SPAM laced with poison)

--Brenna, ThugLadybug@AOL.com

19624.
Innocence; beauty;
Fraility, humanity.
SPAM represents not.

--Brenna, ThugLadybug@AOL.com

19625.
Halitosis? No!
My pungent breath is caused by
The delightful SPAM!

--Brenna, ThugLadybug@AOL.com

19626.
Supercalifrag-
Ilisticexpiala-
Docious! (P.S.--SPAM.)

--Brenna, ThugLadybug@AOL.com

19627.
Another day ends.
It's time for me to head home.
...Thinking thoughts of SPAM...

--Brenna, ThugLadybug@AOL.com

19628.
Well, I am quite sure
That you all think I'm nuts... I'm
Not! I just like SPAM.

--Brenna, ThugLadybug@AOL.com

19629.
I mean, I like to
Write about SPAM. I don't like
Eating it that much.

--Brenna, ThugLadybug@AOL.com

19630.
I think that I just
Spoke blasphemy! I would not
Verbally harm SPAM!

--Brenna, ThugLadybug@AOL.com

19631.
Yet I must digress.
It is now late; I am tired.
No more SPAM tonight.

--Brenna, ThugLadybug@AOL.com

19632.
Dog ate toothsome SPAM.
After, he cleansed his palate
by licking his ass.

--Dudebud, paulsnyder@mindspring.com

19633.
An "Oh....." escapes her.
Dewey, glist'ning, pink, pungent.
It's like licking SPAM.

--Dudebud the Sleepy

19634.
Have worked twenty hours.
To regain the will to live,
I must have fried SPAM.

--Dudebud the Overworked

19635.
Do Nazi Sharon
and his jackboot storm troopers
get to eat SPAM now?

--Shlomo the Disgusted

19636.
U.S. on alert!
Threat of meat terrorism.
Outbreak of SPAMthrax.

--monkeyspleen@yahoo.com

19637.
Crows land in the tree
Squawking, they fight over SPAM
Now they fly away

--Mars Manito, TheHuron1@aol.com

19638.
Pink fat in a can
Cholesterol for my heart
Have I a death wish

--Vic Groves, vjg_vjg@hotmail.com

19639.
Sitting in the spring--
I'm not eating SPAM because
I care about health

--Ian

19640.
Cockroach eating SPAM.
I'll define this with one word.
Cannibalistic.

--Dave Mougin, dmoogie@msn.com

19641.
Brittany loves her
SPAM. She sucks on it, then humps
herself and eats it.

--Josch Gouldman

19642.
Lo, IzaSPAMi,
Japanese volcano god.
My bowels erupt.

--Dudebud, of Loose Bowels

19643.
Ariel Sharon,
new minted Nazi, eats SPAM,
with a clean conscience.

--Shade of Rabin

19644.
A wiggling pink swill
I justify porcine death
This meat IS murder

--Cubby--

19645.
Search engine seeking
The SPAM haiku web archive
I asked for weird shit

--Cubby--

19646.
Dial: eleven
Electrostatic discharge
My SPAMplifier

--Cubby--

19647.
Under Ground Zero
Blue cans in the bomb shelter
I pray for fallout

--Cubby--

19648.
I know you can't make
a silk purse from a sow's ear.
But you can make SPAM!

--Reed Monroe

19649.
In my dream, a room.
Four tin walls; rounded corners.
I wake up screaming.

--Reed Monroe

19650.
Inside Sam Spade's desk--
Top drawer: whiskey bottle.
Second drawer: SPAM.

--Reed Monroe

19651.
Existential dick
Believes in nothing. Except:
Alcohol, nitrates.

--Reed Monroe

19652.
Could have avoided
O'Shaughnessy's falcon mess
by giving her SPAM.

--Reed Monroe

19653.
But it wouldn't work
with the Fat Man or Lorre.
They'd have scarfed it up.

--Reed Monroe

19654.
Cold and congealed, ugh
Add some heat, now nicely browned
Much better to eat

--Youndo

19655.
It looks like a brick.
It ain't. Could be food. No way.
What the hell is it?

--Mark from San Diego, markh@cts.com

19656.
We are the SPAM Borg
Turn the key then lift the lid
Resistance futile.........

--Mark from San Diego, markh@cts.com

19657.
SPAM? Ingredients?
I don't know and I don't care
Ignorance is bliss

--Mark from San Diego, markh@cts.com

19658.
No! says my stomach.
Resistance is not futile........
Upchuck, Ralph, Barf, Puke

--Mark from San Diego, markh@cts.com

19659.
Linda McCartney
Queen of vegetarians
Too dead to eat SPAM

--andrew s

19660.
Sunday afternoon
Only five things on my mind
SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM

--andrew s

19661.
Freezing midwinter
The warmest thing you can wear?
Jacket made of SPAM

--andrew s

19662.
Blood on the tarmac
Crowd gathers round limp body
Killed by high-speed SPAM

--andrew s

19663.
Mouth is cold and dry
Hot SPAM straight out the campfire
Grease congeals on lips

--andrew s

19664.
vegetarians
let us be joined together
against the SPAM threat

--sideways al

19665.
in my opinion
this can only go so far
SPAM is not that great

--axe

19666.
child plays amongst leaves
her innocence still intact--
does not yet know SPAM

--sideways al

19667.
My son's the first in
the family to reach sixth
grade--break out the SPAM!

--Scott Smith, ssmith@us.edu

19668.
Does anyone else
Name thier SPAM before they eat?
No? Oh.......me neither!

--Squishy Lump

19669.
SPAM is da man; but
not THE man...so fight the man,
but don't fight the SPAM.

--Anonymous

19670.
Small pleasures in life:
Sunny days, smiles from strangers,
And greased, canned lunch meat.

--Squishy Lumps

19671.
I really hate SPAM
But I've got it in my head
Damn you SPAM people!

--andrew s

19672.
Thousands of years on,
Civilization is gone.
Only SPAM endures.

--Karellen, karellen@whereyoucantfindme.com

19673.
Spidey had three cans.
The webs couldn't support him.
Evil runs amok.

--Karellen, karellen@whereyoucantfindme.com

19674.
A Star Wars wedding.
Padmé's first meal for Annie?
Naboo SPAM kabobs.

--Karellen, karellen@whereyoucantfindme.com

19675.
No more Scooby Snacks?
Shaggy opens a blue can.
Scooby gulps it all.

--Karellen, karellen@whereyoucantfindme.com

19676.
SPAM lashed to a pole
Timber pyramid burns bright
Sacrificial SPAM

--chris heuer, sixthstreet@gdinet.com

19677.
Monkey Spanking Boy
Endless supply of SPAM love
Never has dry skin

--MSB

19678.
Monkey Spanking Boy
Witness his SPAM obsession
Know it could be you

--MSB

19679.
sunshine SPAM morning
hungry bedhead gobblers say
pass me the SPAM please

--edweena reemer, denise@hmhftvlmgt.com

19680.
SPAM animals roam
freely in Colorado
in high altitude

--edweena reemer, denise@hmhftvlmgt.com

19681.
fog lifting outside
the postman delivers me
a SPAM letter bomb

--andrew s

19682.
I defuse the SPAM
This time it was a close shave
Who is doing this?

--andrew s

19683.
Someone must hate me
Trying to kill me with SPAM
I must watch my step

--andrew s

19684.
SPAM cut with nitrates
Highly explosive mixture
New face of terror

--andrew s

19685.
I found the culprit
Sender of SPAM based terror
It was Madonna

--andrew s

19686.
Why would Madonna
want to kill me with SPAM bombs?
Only she can say.

--andrew s

19687.
I hate Madonna.
SPAM bombs every day in post.
She will never stop.

--andrew s

19688.
I thought of a plan--
send Madonna a SPAM cake,
razorblades inside.

--andrew s

19689.
It wouldn't work, though
Madonna is too clever
She'll never eat SPAM

--andrew s

19690.
She'll win in the end
She's an evil SPAM genius
I'm just a poor kid

--andrew s

19691.
Discarded pig pulp
Bathed in slick, transparent ooze
I choke back vomit

--Brian Rogers

19692.
Lonely plate of SPAM
Your chewy pinkness lures me
Hear my bowels roar

--Brian Rogers

19693.
Lubricated meat
Shines like a toadstool, but pink;
Can-shaped corruption.

--Scott Shanks, ossian@peak.org

19694.
Machine removed meat;
Snout, jowl, member, all float in
Mosaic Jell-O.

--Scott Shanks, ossian@peak.org

19695.
Being a Kosher
Jew, I was just wondering:
Is SPAM really pigs?

--Josch Gouldman

19696.
I once discovered
That SPAM made from donkey meat
Really tastes like ass.

--Neil Cormack

19696.
New York SPAM dinner.
Prime Minister gets bad news.
Oh, shit--a Thai coup!

--Peter Fotopoulos