SPAM Haiku 6201-6300

Move backwards to Numbers 6101-6200.

6201.
worms crawl in and out
ruddy mass of tabloid meat
SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM splash

--Avo Lowe

6202.
frozen squirrel splat
furry jacket wrap SPAM's breast
soft suckle U.S.

--Avo Lowe

6203.
SPAM Kiev ala mode?
Gourmet's editing mistake
Monthly SPAM column

--Sarah Miller Arnold, smarnold@ultranet.com

6204.
A horrible sleep
SPAM lurked in my dreams, searching
Where is the mouthwash?

--Sarah Miller Arnold, smarnold@ultranet.com

6205.
The can awaits me
Blue and yellow nemesis
Cholesterol bomb

--Sarah Miller Arnold, smarnold@ultranet.com

6206.
Mother told me that
"SPAM is not for our kind, dear"
A white-trash sirloin

--Sarah Miller Arnold, smarnold@ultranet.com

6207.
Sad can, filled with fear,
porcine inadequacy.
Call its therapist.

--Sarah Miller Arnold, smarnold@ultranet.com

6208.
Did Arnold Ziffle
in his porcine wisdom dream
of growing up canned?

--Sarah Miller Arnold, smarnold@ultranet.com

6209.
On Valentine's Day
beau brings flowers and some SPAM.
He leaves, door hits ass.

--Sarah Miller Arnold, smarnold@ultranet.com

6210.
Jilted beau cries out
"But it's SPAM, your favorite!";
Can-sized dent in head

--Screamin' P. Erickson, pje@hyperion.haystack.edu

6211.
Spectator sees can
Strike man in head; calls doctor
Meantime, SPAM pillow

--Screamin' P. Erickson, pje@hyperion.haystack.edu

6212.
The blue cans give me
The Hormelian Horrors
Banal pink evil

--Sarah Miller Arnold, smarnold@ultranet.com

6213.
The suck of metal
Pulled from the vacuum-packed tin:
Anticipation

--Sarah Miller Arnold, smarnold@ultranet.com

6214.
He eats his SPAM for
His breakfast, lunch, and dinner
Lonely, lonely, guy

--Sarah Miller Arnold, smarnold@ultranet.com

6215.
Geometric meat
Stacked so neatly on the shelf
Pig squared--nth power

--Sarah Miller Arnold, smarnold@ultranet.com

6216.
Frank Lloyd Wright designed
house entirely made of SPAM.
Most unnatural!

--Sarah Miller Arnold, smarnold@ultranet.com

6217.
If Falling Water
was made of SPAM, would it be
called Clogged Arteries?

--Sarah Miller Arnold, smarnold@ultranet.com

6218.
Frank Lloyd Wright designs
house entirely made of SPAM.
Local wildlife dies.

--Sarah Miller Arnold, smarnold@ultranet.com

6219.
Frank Lloyd Wright's SPAM house
House-warming party nightmare
Evacuation!

--Sarah Miller Arnold, smarnold@ultranet.com

6220.
Plymouth: Pilgrims land.
Indians offer SPAM, gifts.
Back to Mayflower!

--Sarah Miller Arnold, smarnold@ultranet.com

6221.
My sleek, silent friend
With tinned patience you mock me
Release you I must

--Sarah Miller Arnold, smarnold@ultranet.com

6222.
SPAM sold in markets
Heart disease rate rises up
Serial killer?

--Sarah Miller Arnold, smarnold@ultranet.com

6223.
New Guinea warrior
brings white man's SPAM back to tribe;
they shun him for months.

--Sarah Miller Arnold, smarnold@ultranet.com

6224.
Mom served SPAM on all
the major holidays. Oh,
how I dread Easter!

--Sarah Miller Arnold, smarnold@ultranet.com

6225.
A loaf of SPAM, a
glass of wine, and thee, love. Wait!
Where are you going?

--Sarah Miller Arnold, smarnold@ultranet.com

6226.
My eyes grow tired, still
the SPAM muse beckons, vowing
glory in pork prose.

--Sarah Miller Arnold, smarnold@ultranet.com

6227.
I've fear of sleeping
The pork blocks will seek me out
In my wildest dreams

--Sarah Miller Arnold, smarnold@ultranet.com

6228.
Woke up in a pile
Of beer cans, SPAM, and panties.
What a wild party.

--Francis Heaney, fheaney@dcdu.com

6229.
Busy men must eat.
Successful ones develop
A taste for cold SPAM.

--Francis Heaney, fheaney@dcdu.com

6230.
Once a luscious pink,
Now brown, shriveled like a corpse--
Too long in the stove.

--Francis Heaney, fheaney@dcdu.com

6231.
"Inhale," the guru
Instructs. Distracted, he stops.
"Mmm! What is that smell?"

--Francis Heaney, fheaney@dcdu.com

6232.
I opened the can
And saw it was full of eyes.
I think I'll switch brands.

--Francis Heaney, fheaney@dcdu.com

6233.
Ingredients: Salt,
Water, sugar, pork and ham
Sodium Nitrate

--Freaque

6234.
I must have SPAM now.
It is my heart's desire to
Eat that jigglin' flesh.

--Freaque

6235.
It is man-made meat.
It is a health food gone bad
And is not kosher.

--Freaque

6236.
SPAM. It would survive
A big nuclear holocaust.
SPAM rocks! Yeah! SPAM rocks!

--Freaque

6237.
When you're feeling sick
A spoonful of SPAM helps the
Medicine go down.

--Freaque

6238.
Ms. Lee pukes SPAM out
The backs of station wagons
Onto other cars.

--Freaque

6239.
Artist: k.d. lang
Subject: the world's need for SPAM
Song: Constant Craving

--erpenbec@usc.edu

6240.
squeeze goes the trigger
from the skull flies all the spam
who caused such sadness?

--Anonymous

6241.
Dr. Seuss writes "I
Do Not Like Green Eggs and SPAM."
Old tale, new ending.

--Matt Nielsen, mnielsen@dttus.com

6242.
Bedtime: Go to sleep
now or it's SPAM for breakfast.
A childhood nightmare.

--Matt Nielsen, mnielsen@dttus.com

6243.
McChicken, McRibs,
McNuggets. I guess McSPAM
would be redundant.

--Matt Nielsen, mnielsen@dttus.com

6244.
SPAM, the gift of God
Inheritance of the meek
Pop the lid, rejoice!

--Anonymous

6245.
SPAM slab on my plate
Pink and slimy pseudomeat
Mom made me eat it

--Mary Holt, maryholt@flash.net

6246.
Glutinous slab of
Cardiovascular death
You eat it and die

--Mary Holt, maryholt@flash.net

6247.
Why do they sell this
Can of animal trimmings?
Why do we buy this?

--Mary Holt, maryholt@flash.net

6248.
Didn't want the SPAM
Slimy pink chunks on my plate
Mom made me eat it

--Mary Holt, maryholt@flash.net

6249.
My email in-box
Blue and yellow Hormel cans
Both are full of spam

--Mary Holt, maryholt@flash.net

6250.
The AOL bunch
And all of the Hormel folks
Purveyors of spam

--Mary Holt, maryholt@flash.net

6251.
Barfing at altar
The priest's fingers slick with grease
A SPAM communion

--Mary Holt, maryholt@flash.net

6252.
Unholy blue cans
Bet the Anti-Christ eats it
It's the anti-food

--Mary Holt, maryholt@flash.net

6253.
Made chicken-fried SPAM.
No kidding--my ex-husband
Loved it for dinner

--Mary Holt, maryholt@flash.net

6254.
Don't feed your kids SPAM
Bet that's how Jeffrey Dahmer
Got urge to eat folks

--Mary Holt, maryholt@flash.net

6255.
Can--blue and yellow.
Cub scout uniform--the same.
A coincidence?

--Mary Holt, maryholt@flash.net

6256.
Concentrated pork,
SPAM makes bacon look kosher
By comparison.

--Mary Holt, maryholt@flash.net

6257.
Surfed the Internet
Found SPAM haiku page by chance
A new obsession

--Mary Holt, maryholt@flash.net

6258.
My labor intense
I compose new SPAM haiku
They think I'm working

--Mary Holt, maryholt@flash.net

6259.
Using SPAM as lube
Imparts a whole new meaning
To the term "porking"

--Mary Holt, maryholt@flash.net

6260.
Turning the SPAM key,
Unlocking the fat-laden
Mysteries within.

--Mary Holt, maryholt@flash.net

6261.
"SPAM is good for you,"
said the prophet, on the cross.
Crucified for SPAM.

--Christian Mackie

6262.
The Devil made SPAM
to destroy society.
It is working well

--Christian Mackie

6263.
Beautiful pinkness
Clear jelly between my toes
And then come the socks

--Zak Brown

6264.
SPAM lasts forever
World War Two made you happen
Python made famous

--Anonymous

6265.
Joan Crawford really
beat children with SPAM slices.
Slandered after death.

--Sarah Miller Arnold, smarnold@ultranet.com

6266.
What is that horrid
smell? Queen Elizabeth has
new cook beheaded.

--Sarah Miller Arnold, smarnold@ultranet.com

6267.
After the divorce
Fergie looks for perfect job:
Hormel spokeswoman!

--Sarah Miller Arnold, smarnold@ultranet.com

6268.
Princess Di--a true
Goodwill Ambassador--will
never speak of SPAM.

--Sarah Miller Arnold, smarnold@ultranet.com

6269.
My brother still likes
his Vienna Sausages.
See: childhood trauma.

--Sarah Miller Arnold, smarnold@ultranet.com

6270.
Where are my panties?
And, wait...where did the SPAM go??
Oh Francis, you pig!

--Eye

6271.
Belgian beer or SPAM?
The pink stuff made me come back
to Detroit, no less...

--Eye

6272.
Dogs eat their own barf,
Humans eat mushed pig called SPAM.
What's the difference?

--Rob Latsha, http://WWW.SWT.EDU/~rl26598

6273.
SPAM on the wet ground
It's squishy between my toes
No one licks my feet

--Anonymous

6274.
"SPAM drives my illness.
Gorge the gelatinous mess!
Do I sicken you?"

--Jim Dever, JDever@king5.com

6275.
It whispers to me.
Squishy SPAM beneath my toes!
Finger-licking good?

--Anonymous

6276.
entombed beneath us
stale fallout shelter regrets
a cold war SPAM dream

--avo lowe

6277.
frightened reindeer paws.
santa's slumped form. sleigh falls. SPAM
in big red pocket.

--avo lowe

6278.
masked students surround
anatomy cadaver.
"SPAM sandwich?" class ends.

--avo lowe

6279.
satellite dish down.
no jimmy swaggert, so i
eat my SPAM with tears.

--avo lowe

6280.
two flutes stuck in SPAM.
conductor trembles. white rage.
damn tuba players.

--avo lowe

6281.
june. black mercury,
all day texas sun, pop trunk:
tonight we drink SPAM.

--avo lowe

6282.
Chinese puzzle box
Holds unreachable treasure--
Can without a key.

--Francis Heaney, fheaney@dcdu.com

6283.
SPAM sliced so thinly
It flutters when I drop it.
Then the dog eats it.

--Francis Heaney, fheaney@dcdu.com

6284.
The attic collapsed
Under the weight of the SPAM--
Grandma's secret stash.

--Francis Heaney, fheaney@dcdu.com

6285.
SPAM: nostalgic treat
Whose sharp scent recalls my youth
Near the slaughterhouse.

--Francis Heaney, fheaney@dcdu.com

6286.
wake up. brush. SPAM feels
gritty on my teeth. damn. next
time buy real toothpaste.

--spamdaddy

6287.
Awake with a scream;
Slimy potted meat haunts me.
Must get my toothbrush!

--Anonymous

6288.
beaucoup de grands chefs
float facedown Seine. Hormel pulls
SPAM from Paris shelves.

--avo lowe

6289.
her hairy armpits
disclose the pink traces. SPAM
squish addict, lost soul.

--avo lowe

6290.
Scientifically
Processed Animal Matter:
A true acronym!

--Rik Williams, fermi@cris.com

6291.
Oozing porcine spleen,
I eat your gelled secretion
From a rounded tin.

--Derek Ruetsch, 76232.2746@compuserve.com

6292.
Praise the Lord Jesus,
Providing me this manna;
Pink grainy crushed pig.

--Derek Ruetsch, 76232.2746@compuserve.com

6293.
For whom the pork tolls,
I shudder, ever closer.
My love; sintered swine.

--Derek Ruetsch, 76232.2746@compuserve.com

6294.
Wee funky porklet,
I thrust you in the grinder;
Eat your congealed mass.

--Derek Ruetsch, 76232.2746@compuserve.com

6295.
Punctured pig remains;
Focus in upon its brains.
My apéritif.

--Derek Ruetsch, 76232.2746@compuserve.com

6296.
Can--what you contain...
The lifeblood of the masses.
Saving block-'o'-hog.

--Derek Ruetsch, 76232.2746@compuserve.com

6297.
Tender, succulent,
Overachieving pig mash.
Sign me up for more!!!

--Derek Ruetsch, 76232.2746@compuserve.com

6298.
I wanted sweet meat
made by man and chemicals
but not by nature.

--Hans C. Masing, hans@anecdote.com

6299.
Oh, constipation.
The bowels are clamped shut now;
I think I'll have SPAM.

--Hans C. Masing, hans@anecdote.com

6300.
How the sweet pinkness
causes thoughts of lustfulness
and porkulescence.

--Hans C. Masing, hans@anecdote.com