SPAM Haiku 12401-12500

Move backwards to Numbers 12301-12400.


12401.
SPAM is right for me,
and SPAM is right for you, but
not for the old guys.
--Jon Krause, Krause27@earthlink.net

12402.
I was sitting at
work, and suddenly... I saw
a sign--it said SPAM.

--Jon Krause, Krause27@earthlink.net

12403.
SPAM SPAM SPAM what have
you got? Just your little can,
to sit from and watch.

--Jon Krause, krause27@earthlink.net

12404.
I was at the best
Bar, and suddenly I saw
It. A small SPAM can.

--Jon Krause, krause27@earthlink.net

12405.
It was just sitting
right there, not causing any
fuss. But he ate it.

--Jon Krause, krause27@earthlink.net

12406.
I forgive you SPAM,
You Clinton of the lunch meats--
Go and sin no more.

--Arkansas Zipper Man, Noone@nowhere.com

12407.
Handy stuff that SPAM,
It's right up there with duct tape--
Ouch! said the gerbil.

--Arkansas Zipper Man, Noone@nowhere.com

12408.
SPAM, I have craved you
Deep in salivary glands
A burst of spittle!

--lauri

12409.
Ex-pig, hot-pink ears,
Quivering clammy gray food,
Smack it on Oreo.

--Gary Vineyard, JGVineyard@aol.com

12410.
What is SPAM made of?
Whatever it is, it's good!
SPAM is very good.

--bman, Bobhill@hotmail.com

12411.
Aroma enchants
Sweet smell of honeysuckle
No, SPAM in my pants!

--Bill(Pooh Bear Foo)

12412.
Just noticed this site
Love to eat spam on the net...
Now my keyboard does

--Bill(Pooh Bear Foo), I love this site!

12413.
Paste me with pink loaf
I yearn for a salty treat
I gleam with pork fat

--Lynda Hallmark, lgh6@columbia.edu

12414.
Taboo use of SPAM
Feed it to bratty children
Olson Twins, beware

--Rev. Chris, chrisdeneen@mindspring.com

12415.
Linda, are you mad?!
Get that SPAM out of your mouth.
Besides, you're Jewish.

--Rev. Chris, chrisdeneen@mindspring.com

12416.
Got a long road trip?
SPAM will help make the trip fun!
Oil up the bodies.

--Anonymous

12417.
Tibia shavings
Tortured, anointed with gel
Served to the army

--Matt Clenott

12418.
Fry me to a crisp
I am best if used by June
Two thousand seven

--Matt Clenott

12419.
Hormel attorneys
Warn of dire consequences
Should this continue

--Matt Clenott

12420.
So much disrespect!
You think you're too good for me?
Am I chopped liver?

--Matt Clenott

12421.
Candlelight and wine
The greasy slab shimmers pink
Anticipation

--Matt Clenott

12422.
SPAM all you can eat
Gorging pink pork cubes in sauce
Vomitorium

--Hugh Mongous, thyroid@ix.netcom.com

12423.
Lament empty can.
Burp. Belch. Grease stain on t-shirt.
Not bad Friday night.

--John Barrett, barrettj@cch.com

12424.
Three empty SPAM cans
Rattle across the truckbed
Of my trusty Ford.

--Eric M. Christiansen

12425.
To love SPAM and PEZ
Delicacies to enjoy
Foods of mystery

--Mo in Madison

12426.
The problem Brutus,
Lies but not within the stars
But within the SPAM.

--robert, robbieheath@hotmail.com

12427.
Toy with my tastebuds
Insult my brain, yet again
Hunger devours thoughts

--Trixie

12428.
SPAM, glorious SPAM,
Better than the perfect ham
Encased in the can.

--Rose Cain, bkltprncs

12429.
Always SPAM I eat
Every recipe a treat
Will be ralphing you

--Bob Choderker

12430.
to get the T-shirt
i must eat a can of SPAM?
forget the T-shirt

--robbie, robbieheath@hotmail.com

12431.
What is this pink crap?
I ponder this as I stare
At the processed meat.

--Anonymous

12432.
SPAM, wonderful SPAM.
You sit and jiggle as the
wind blows over you.

--Anonymous

12433.
The girl is fed SPAM
SPAM, the processed, rancid meat
Is this her last meal?

--Anonymous

12434.
They stare at the plate.
God only knows what it is.
The pink mass jiggles.

--Anonymous

12435.
My God, look at it!
It's headed straight for us, help!
False alarm, it's SPAM.

--Anonymous

12436.
O, here comes the meat,
The terrible processed meat,
SPAM will save the day!

--Anonymous

12437.
Blue SPAM monolith
Imperturbably awaits
Glorious rebirth.

--Eric M. Christiansen, zenhouse@earthlink.net

12438.
Pink light through window?
'Tis the east, and Juliet
is the...is the.....SPAM?!?

--S. Bookner

12439.
El SPAM-o es mal.
Mas mal que mi español.
(Y eso es mal.)

--S. Bookner

12440.
Black holes are awesome.
Not even light can escape.
SPAM is expelled, though.

--S. Bookner

12441.
Not-so-famous lines:
"'Twas a dark and SPAMMY night.
Suddenly, he puked."

--S. Bookner

12442.
Here's a tough challenge:
Watch Barney while eating SPAM.
Purple/pink nightmare.

--S. Bookner

12443.
Eat SPAM while biking.
Which is worse in your stomach?
Handlebars or SPAM?

--S. Bookner

12444.
Play SPAMopoly.
Visit Barfwalk and Puke Place.
Get out of gel free.

--S. Bookner

12445.
Wheel of Misfortune:
Game show with a SPAM-based theme.
Wanna buy a bowel?

--S. Bookner

12446.
A scarecrow eats SPAM.
If he only had a brain,
he would starve instead.

--S. Bookner

12447.
What am I doing
I'm s'posed to be a poet
God damn you SPAM-Ku

--Lorelei

12448.
early morning words
with a cherry flower breath's
enlightening me

--navest kamber, rebacek@yahoo.com

12449.
Post-beach hunger pangs
Oshima's neon welcomes
"SPAM sushi special"

--Hawaiian memories

12450.
east meets west at noon
a green leaf bed, blackened SPAM
with silken tofu

--Hawaiian memories

12451.
two eggs any style
with Portuguese sausage or
pineapple-glazed SPAM

--Hawaiian memories

12452.
last vacation night
a fiery sunset becomes
wedge of coral SPAM

--Hawaiian memories

12453.
The meal of Hormel
Horror meal in all vision
I run porcelain

--Common Trog

12454.
Teletubby games
Stuff SPAM in every sphincter
Watch their butts explode

--BFarringer@aol.com

12455.
Seven fat guys drank
And staunchly defended SPAM
Then I burned their shoes

--BFarringer@aol.com

12456.
Play me like a game
Toss me into tubs of SPAM
Show me how to pee

--BFarringer@aol.com

12457.
Why oh why must I
Sell my soul to Barney now
When SPAM's what I know

--BFarringer@aol.com

12458.
Flotillas of nuns
Tried to make lists of weird names
But instead ate SPAM

--BFarringer@aol.com

12459.
Rapists stormed the streets
Looking for dead chinchillas
While wearing SPAM pants

--BFarringer@aol.com

12460.
Heavy metal SPAM
Children playing dominoes
Cleveland loves cleavage

--BFarringer@aol.com

12461.
New bedtime story:
Snow White and the seven SPAMs.
Prince Charming, beware.

--S. Bookner

12462.
One, two, three, and four.
I don't want no SPAM no more.
Five, six, seven, eight. (if haiku had 4 lines, this would end great)

--S. Bookner

12463.
What Rhett really said:
"Frankly my dear, I don't give
a SPAM." They cut it.

--teeny

12464.
Oh no, you've been tricked.
It's not a burger, it SPAM!
You await your fate.

--BILLY BOB JOE

12465.
Night unfurls splendor
Surrender your darkest dreams
SPAM--grasp it, sense it

--Phantom of the SPAM, Deerjager

12466.
Monica gave Bill
A warm SPAM Spem enema--
Anal oral sex.

--Elizia Knough, elizlikarug@night.com

12467.
Monica Queen SPAM:
She's a good old boy's good girl--
Full luscious hot lips.

--T. Kennedy, GlubGlub@bridge.nonet

12468.
Don't knock the SPAM boys,
We may have to eat it cold--
Y2K's coming.

--Francis A. Nasticountry, Weewee@eifel.not

12469.
Have a SPAM banquet...
Who to invite? What to wear?
Clintons. Black tie, tails.

--Rose Cain, bkltprncs@aol.com

12470.
Years of eating it...
Diligent efforts pay off:
Home made of SPAM cans.

--Rose Cain, bkltprncs@aol.com

12471.
The sweet promised land
With milk and honey flowing--
To wash down canned SPAM.

--Ubetcha Rass, Ustaeat@night.not

12472.
Cold staring fragments
Once quivering roadkill shards--
Emotionless....still.

--Margot DeHives, scratchie@itchinutz.com

12473.
You got HCV?
Better not chomp on the SPAM--
It's hepatoxic.

--HCV ?, Go To Hep Central...http://hepatitis-central.com/

12474.
Steaming pink quiver,
Heater blows cold porcine fumes.
All-SPAM anti-freeze.

--Spankin' Sammy, rmorgis@xnet.com

12475.
Betty the Yeti
Sits squatting on her haunches
SPAM clings to her maw

--Camus, kokyuho@yahoo.com

12476.
pork and other parts
stuck between my crooked teeth
mommy take me home

--MILHOUSE

12477.
stop teasing me SPAM!
your blue can is unfunny
and I'm sensitive

--MILHOUSE

12478.
life is beautiful
with my girlfriend on my left
and SPAM in my pants

--MILHOUSE

12479.
Many spankerchiefs
will never meet their maker.
SPAM conquers the hand.

--MILHOUSE

12480.
oh holy SPAM-gods!
I bow to your processed loins
not unlike head-cheese

--MILHOUSE

12481.
butter and whole wheat
welfare cheese and a hot grill
the difference? - SPAM

--MILHOUSE

12482.
SPAM, oh SPAM, oh SPAM
why you do this to a man
who worships your can

--MILHOUSE

12483.
the cold and the snow
the icy pond turns to fun
when I wear SPAM-skates

--MILHOUSE

12484.
pager goes BEEP! BEEP!
and you KNOW I'll call you back
SPAM needs some booty

--MILHOUSE

12485.
I need a plunger
there's a big-ass hunk of SPAM
stuck in the toilet

--MILHOUSE

12486.
though I love hot-fudge
NEVER try a SPAM sundae
without the sprinkles

--MILHOUSE

12487.
like the smell of farts
a freshly cracked can of SPAM
is a cherished friend

--MILHOUSE

12488.
The flag flies above
The morning drive-thru breakfast
I buy SPAM biscuit

--Dr. Fritz, docfritz@aol.com

12489.
I am early for
The Monday morning meeting
Please feed me more SPAM

--Dr. Fritz, docfritz@aol.com

12490.
foodstuff and hammer
convenient tin has spam
ergonomic food

--technope@netscape.net

12491.
Open the can now
If you want to be thirsty
The rest of the day.

--Matt Clenott

12492.
Cry little pink friend.
Only dark skies 'round the bend,
Your pain will ne'er end.

--Albert The Dog

12493.
You scream without sound
You can't run from the abuse
Suffer silent SPAM

--Albert The Dog

12494.
Fire and the demons,
not what should be feared in hell,
only SPAM scares me.

--Albert the dog

12495.
Apocalypse comes.
What will I eat? Foods all gone.
Except SPAM and bums.

--Albert the dog

12496.
Demon! Flee from me!
Because I have a Bible,
and a can of SPAM.

--Albert the dog

12497.
Ghandi on a strike.
Why won't the great leader eat?
He only has SPAM.

--Albert the dog

12498.
Feared in the Mid East,
Indiscriminate killer,
The mighty SPAM mine.

--Albert the dog

12499.
Green field of summer
Puffy clouds take shape in sky
Looks like SPAM to me

--Dr. Fritz, docfritz@aol.com

12500.
Is it an art form
Or just another excuse
To contemplate SPAM?

--Dr. Fritz, docfritz@aol.com


Move forwards to Numbers 12501-12600.
Return to the SPAM Haiku Archive page.
John Nagamichi Cho


SPAM is a registered trademark of Hormel Foods Corporation for luncheon meat. The Haiku Archive Master and the contributors to this website have no legal, commercial or financial involvement with Hormel Foods. Neither the information presented here, nor the manner in which it has been presented, has been sanctioned by Hormel Foods.