SPAM Haiku 10301-10400

Move backwards to Numbers 10201-10300.


10301.
Ten thousand! More each
Day!! Something this popular
Must be illegal.
--Geoff Holme, Geoff_Holme@vos.stratus.com

10302.
Hey, it's "Say Something
Nice About SPAM Week"
! Er... Um...
Why don't you go first?

--Geoff Holme, Geoff_Holme@vos.stratus.com

10303.
Hollywood today:
Stuff plot, effects, ads in can
It's SPAMageddon.

--Bob Greiner, greinerb@earthlink.net

10304.
Smoke a fat cigar
Eat a juicy SPAMBURGER
Satisfy your soul

--Timmy Partridge, UK

10305.
How do I love SPAM?
In foreign food recipes
In Ireland perhaps.

--I R A N T, Cobby@hurstnet.com

10306.
You can't beat women
But you sure can beat your SPAM.
Stick to SPAM, O.J.!

--Cal. Reamer, SF Cally

10307.
When parents grow old
Children tape them in wheelchairs
And make THEM eat SPAM.

--G. Menendez, 'nuf said

10308.
Golden pagoda
Glistens like the geisha's thighs
SPAM cleans and protects

--Spamus Shamus, anonymous

10309.
And for the bike jocks:
Bicycle seats made of SPAM
Scratch, sniff, and eat stuff.

--Ruby Wright, hey rube@proc.edunut

10310.
In between the ears
Of supervisors it's known
Vast SPAM mines exist.

--Johnny Tartus, Hey Chelsea!

10311.
Weekend warriors
And chippies who just dabble
Still buy more than SPAM

--H. Long, henryl@aol.com

10312.
Your eyes.......Pools of SPAM
I melt into your secret
And drip down your hair.

--Oh Tammy, I love you girl, Call me @ once

10313.
Right now Japan is
Exactly where greed took them
Spammed too many loans

--Itsa Bitchi, Rong@smartmail.com

10314.
I eat this poison
It ravages my body
But I enjoy it

--Bobbie Joe Gonad, zoolooney1@hotmail.com

10315.
The SPAM I eat now;
Gluttonous, I consume thee.
Sleep, perhaps, to dream?

--Shookie

10316.
Doctors said I was
A hypochondriac; then
They heard I ate SPAM...

--Geoff Holme, Geoff_Holme@vos.stratus.com

10317.
Would you like the SPAM?
No, I think I'll have some Treet
SPAM's rival pink meat

--Rhiannon, LadySomnus@aol.com

10318.
A dusty can sits
So high upon the top shelf
Poor unfulfilled me!

--Rhiannon, LadySomnus@aol.com

10319.
A word to the wise
If you fry it, they will come
That's how to get guys

--Rhiannon, LadySomnus@aol.com

10320.
Pink food sits on plate
Green stomach reels from the blow
Blue face waits doctor

--Ron Huddleston, r_huddleston@yahoo.com

10321.
Oh joyous food stuff
End my hunger pains for free
SPAM paid for my school

--Ron Huddleston, r_huddleston@yahoo.com

10322.
God created Man
Man is so far less than God
Man created SPAM

--Ron Huddleston, r_huddleston@yahoo.com

10323.
God created Man
Man is imperfect on Earth
Man created SPAM

--Ron Huddleston, r_huddleston@yahoo.com

10324.
1980 SPAM
Superb texture, smoky taste,
Smooth greasy finish.

--Vintage SPAM

10325.
Chili beans and SPAM
I can't go hunting today
Buckshot for the john

--Cujo

10326.
We are hard working
We are true SPAM eating folk
We're just plain hard up

--Bogus Name, Bogus E-mail

10327.
Hush up and listen....
Hear it sizzling in the pan?
SPAM's saying "Eat me!"

--Jerry C.

10328.
So you're a mermaid?
Why you so green, fishy girl?
You been eating SPAM?

--Katy the Mermaid

10329.
I gave my life up
So you could nosh on pink flesh
Eat me with relish

--Ron Huddleston, r_huddleston@yahoo.com

10330.
Squealing pig goes in
God know what happens inside
You can taste the pain

--Ron Huddleston, r_huddleston

10331.
I gave my wife love
She gave me just SPAM to eat
What did I do, now?

--Ron Huddleston, r_huddleston@yahoo.com

10332.
Pig hooves or cow dung?
Perhaps the bark of a tree.
What is SPAM, really?

--Chck" the fag" Soder

10333.
Anniversaries
All of them gifted with SPAM
We need a divorce

--Hey Joe

10334.
Iran .....There's no SPAM
To the store to get some more
Blue can, thank you ma'am

--Acksuse Me

10335.
Pot and SPAM combo
Like Howie and Virgin Buoy
There's no good taste there

--WRKOuch

10336.
Porkers immortal
Mummified hawg in a can
Egyptian envy

--King Tut Tut

10337.
Live, love, laugh, like SPAM
That's the kind of guy I am
Mostly gone to pot

--Spamaman

10338.
Don't let it hang out
I keep my pork in the can
And I am not gay

--Barney Hotdog

10339.
Pink pork inspector
She's always checking it out
Hey girlie, look up

--K.T. Lady

10340.
Tell me about SPAM
A young boy asked his grandpaw
Grandpaw blew his nose

--Our Son Wells

10341.
Momma, what is SPAM?
Well......this little piggy got
Stomped, squished, smashed, and canned.

--Anonymous

10342.
Garden of delights
Earthy, essential, secret
And SPAM had the key

--eric h.

10343.
My mother, bless her
Although she never ate SPAM
Force fed it to us.

--Menendez Boyz

10344.
Roaches don't eat SPAM
Teaches the ringless caller
Enemama mine

--Enemama

10345.
some animal parts
thrown together in a can
a spam loaf is made

--jenn presutto, D2P2WMNJ

10346.
Priests like little boys
They should let them get married
And SPAM their own kids

--Judas Priest

10347.
Wrestling nude in SPAM,
gelatinous by-products
smeared across my breasts.

--laura, lal34@columbia.edu

10348.
Soccer is sports SPAM
The French win using their heads
Didn't they always?

--Wee Wee Mon Sewer, Pepe Le Phew

10349.
SPAM, erection food
SPAM helps raise buildings, bridges
And teepeed the sheets

--Anonymous

10350.
Alcoholics drink,
Shake, sweat, heave, and stink out loud...
SPAM does that to me.

--Al Coholic

10351.
SPAM cures what ails you
Like a haircut for your guts
A ball, just for you

--Spamkoot, J. Grey

10352.
It's not how you live
It's how you die that matters.
Let SPAM help you out.

--Bagman, bross@aol.com

10353.
Want to lose weight fast?
Limit your intake to SPAM.
Up to here, I am.

--Anyone that's Me

10354.
Play SPAM dominoes
Rapid improvement promised
Loser must eat tiles

--Pink Dominoes

10355.
Life in the projex
You can smell the SPAM smoking
In between the checks

--Lafrac/Iraq, Ny Ny

10356.
dingleberry jam
not beef, not chicken or ham
toilet tissued SPAM

--Pressedham Don`tnap, docyoga@aol.com

10357.
behold my nodules
swollen with SPAM's great bounty
toxic treasure chest

--Pressedham Don`tnap, docyoga@aol.com

10358.
grip reality
in one hand, SPAM in other
see which makes more farts

--Pressedham Don`tnap, docyoga@aol.com

10359.
gotta get some SPAM
or social life will surely
go down the shit can

--Pressedham Don`tnap, docyoga@aol.com

10360.
pubic hairs crusty
with SPAM's tell-tale flakes are hard
to explain to wife

--Pressedham Don`tnap, docyoga@aol.com

10361.
Mona Lisa smiles
so peaceful and knowingly
she before SPAM's time

--Pressedham Don`tnap, docyoga@aol.com

10362.
Luciano, Lucky
Thought everything was ducky
Until he was SPAMMED

--Anonymous

10363.
Mr. Christopher
Used to be a Saint, but ain't
Fridays he ate SPAM

--Anonymous

10364.
I'm doing ten years.
That's how many cans of SPAM
And salad tosses?

--Chef No Tell

10365.
Military men
Love to eat their happy mess.
"Don't ask, don't tell"......Guess!

--Bilko

10366.
The Crapper Rapper
Ate a can of Hormel SPAM
Play Stop The Music

--Constipated Sam

10367.
Dixie cups of SPAM
Small boobs in southern bras man
I thought it was sweat

--Johnny Reb

10368.
My girlfriend Sushi,
Tasty little tuna bit,
Whiffs louder than SPAM!

--Charles T. Una

10369.
Brand new baby child....
As pink and slimy as SPAM,
But they say he's cute.

--Crazy Janie , Boston

10370.
Warriors dying
Gushing blood and flushing life
Patch 'em up with SPAM

--Rhodie

10371.
SPAM in my urine?
It must have been Monica's.
She eats anything

--Bubba Si

10372.
Vegemite Aussies
Would rather slow poke hossies
Then give up their SPAM.

--Dundee

10373.
Let Sheila feel ya
And you won't go back to men
SPAM maybe, men no!

--Dundee

10374.
Don't Gingrich your newt
Or you're apt to go blind boy...
No more SPAM slammin'!

--Ya Hear Me Boy, elrich@umed.edu

10375.
Ol' Scarface Capone
Ate his SPAM with provolone
In his cell alone

--Salami

10376.
Sushi Emperor
Just quit his long time tit job.
Oh well, back to SPAM.

--Jack H. Orner

10377.
Judge Judy and Koch
Just jumped Rusty the bailiff.
Now ain't that some SPAM?

--West 42nd St

10378.
I just looked up SPAM
On my K-Mart computer
Bill Clinton's picture

--Newt Gringoich

10379.
For half a speedball
Drug Spammers line up daily
Methadone clinics

--Free to be

10380.
Tribal casinos
Free SPAM hors d'oeuvres at Foxwoods
Big red man payback

--Henry C. Clark, hen@dcoop.net

10381.
Eve gave Adam SPAM.
God sent Eve out for more SPAM.
Eve went to the can.

--Lee Malone, leemalone@aol.com

10382.
"For war use only"
SPAM thank god still in the cans
Please pray for world peace

--hortensia anderson, editors@calamitas.com

10383.
Trout stream, swirling pool
Tempting SPAM balls sink slowly
Blam! Hook-up, pan fry

--Sad Tomato

10384.
Old moonshine country..
Top shelf devilled eggs and SPAM.
Cheez Whiz, this is life!

--West Virginny, Hey WV! Haha

10385.
Dye your bloomers gals
Pink would be the choice color
SPAM does that to ya

--Spameater, prospammer@large.now

10386.
At the county fair
All the SPAM that you can eat
Jell-O scented johns

--Larry Notkins, chelsea.ma.

10387.
The blue shades of night
ZIP, RIP, SCREAM! across my lobes
Why did I eat SPAM?

--Elmer Marter, neveragain, notever

10388.
Moon made of pink SPAM
Shine down on our glossy butts
Reflections of love

--Spam Crossed, Lovers in Vt.

10389.
Please Lassie, come home
We'll buy some Kibbles and Bits
But you'll still eat SPAM

--Little Timmy, on the old farm

10390.
Too drunk to stand up.
Couldn't cook, so we ate SPAM
On a one night stand.

--Scully Square, I'll be there

10391.
Raggedy Anne D.
Really knows how to burn SPAM.
Georgia girls can cook.

--Peanut Head, Go Ga. Ga.

10392.
Paranoid Perry
Never could get too merry
Until he swilled SPAM

--HEY PERRY, IT'S ME

10393.
Smell, bite, chew, taste, burp!
Don a dress and strut your SPAM
Starvin' Marvin's back!

--Not Marvin's back, Oh no, he is, poor thing.

10394.
No SPAM Starvin' Marv
Here, take a bite outa this!
Dammit, he bit me!

--Marvin's Snapper

10395.
SPAM spackle your john
Out there in the dark holler
A gal gits hungry

--No. Carolina, Speed trap, country USA

10396.
Yo! Cross your legs gals....
No free peeks Mac Daddy's SPAM,
An that be da word!

--walter johnson, everett man

10397.
The ex-gov. of Mass
Spammed so often for so long
Tinted his hair pink

--Pink Stinker , and that's the truth

10398.
Spamilingusly
he ogled the warm, pink meat.
Poised....ready to snatch.

--SpammaJamma

10399.
Buckminster Abbey,
Now there's a real piece of work.
Y'all eat SPAM and Di!

--Whimpy Countree

10400.
None of you can help.
Can you de-calorize SPAM?
Then just go away.

--OA Mamma, UB2 fat 4me


Move forwards to Numbers 10401-10500.
Return to the SPAM Haiku Archive page.
John Nagamichi Cho


SPAM is a registered trademark of Hormel Foods Corporation for luncheon meat. The Haiku Archive Master and the contributors to this website have no legal, commercial or financial involvement with Hormel Foods. Neither the information presented here, nor the manner in which it has been presented, has been sanctioned by Hormel Foods.